July 19, 2010

* An Odd day ....

Things are just a little off.  Not only with me, but with many people I know in different parts of the world.  I do wonder sometimes exactly what affects us all in these strange ways.  I seem to have lost Lupe today.  My very favorite Mistro.  I really don't want anyone else to finish my house.  Lupe is an artisan.  The fountain he is building is beautiful.  I don't want it to change hands in the middle of everything.  Do I have any control over all of this?  No, of course not.  So I simply have to let it be.  It is what it is.  No use me getting myself in a flap when there really is nothing I can do.  Perhaps tomorrow Lupe will return.  I can only hope.

Also had a very perplexing e-mail from a very old and dear friend today.  That threw me for about 62 loops.  Don't know what to do about that either.  It is what it is as well.  I can only let it be.

It's during these times I realize just how much control over anything I do not have.  Control is such an illusion.  Why do we really want to control anyway?  Can't change people.  Don't want to.  It's their lives and their choices.  Why isn't it easier to just let it be.  BECAUSE, it's about attachment, it's about love, it's about not wanting things to change.  Change is a given.  It's the one constant thing in our lives.  If we don't deal with change well, we don't deal with life well.  Surrender and Accept.  If Lupe doesn't come back tomorrow, there will be a new Mistro who will do a wonderful job in his own way.  It will simply be different. 

So, we have settled that.  I took some photos from the roof terrace tonight.  I will share.  Every night it is different from the roof.  Every night it is beautiful

One evening, six very different photos.  In moments, the wind changes, the clouds change, the sun changes.  The photo changes.  Like life.  Constant change.

"You've changed so much.  I guess that's what happens.  I wish you knew how much you changed me.  I
wonder if I changed you, if your life is different because of me.  Mine is different because of you.  My God, you taught me so much, and now we don't even talk to each other.  I guess that's what happens."

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